They say everything is bigger and in turn better in Texas. But after seeing a pack of dogs rip apart cars at a Houston-area dealership, we’re not so sure about life in the Lone Star State. After all, you might be trapped in a Buc-ee’s by one of these canine gangs and forced to watch Fido chew apart your cheap Hyundai bumper as you sit helplessly snacking on some beef jerky. Or at least that could happen.
People trust Google Maps way too much.
Back to the story, the Cypress dealership originally thought a pack of wolves attacked its stock of cars on the lot. Maybe that’s a common problem in Texas? We don’t think so but are really starting to wonder why so many people live there.
Anyway, as ABC13 Houston reports, the culprits are in fact stray dogs and they’ve attacked the dealership’s cars a few times. That seems like odd behavior for dogs or even wolves since their natural enemy isn’t the automobile, but we’re not biologists so we can’t even tell you what a dog is, at least not under oath.
One theory about why these attacks are happening is that cats are hiding in the dealership’s cars. The dogs are trying to kill the cats and so they tear apart all those lovely plastic parts that are like chew toys for canines. We’d love to see them try this with the new Cybertruck, which we hear is bulletproof or arrowproof or something.
As mentioned in the report, the owners or the dealership don’t seem to know what to do. They contacted police who let them know it’s a civil matter between them and the dogs. No, we’re not making that up. Dealership employees are understandably scared.
Have these guys thought of contacting Cesar Millan? We hear he can whisper and naughty dogs listen. Instead, police recommended hiring a private investigator to find the dogs’ owner so the dealership can sue. It’s not a bad idea. In the meantime damages are in the hundreds of thousands of dollars. Yikes.
